VP and his shotgun

[William]

Hi Folks, There's some good ones here. Will
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TV Comedians Target Cheney Accident
Tuesday February 14 4:10 AM ET

Television talk shows took aim Monday at Vice President Dick Cheney's accidental weekend shooting in Texas of a hunting companion. Here are a few of the jokes.
___
"Late Show with David Letterman," CBS:
_ "Good news, ladies and gentlemen, we have finally located weapons of mass destruction: It's Dick Cheney."
_ "But here is the sad part before the trip Donald Rumsfeld had denied the guy's request for body armor."
_ "We can't get Bin Laden, but we nailed a 78-year-old attorney."
_ "The guy who got gunned down, he is a Republican lawyer and a big Republican donor and fortunately the buck shot was deflected by wads of laundered cash. So he's fine. He took a little in the wallet."
__
"The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," NBC:
_ "Although it is beautiful here in California, the weather back East has been atrocious. There was so much snow in Washington, D.C., Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fat guy thinking it was a polar bear.
_ "That's the big story over the weekend. ... Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fellow hunter, a 78-year-old lawyer. In fact, when people found out he shot a lawyer, his popularity is now at 92 percent."
_ "I think Cheney is starting to lose it. After he shot the guy he screamed, 'Anyone else want to call domestic wire tapping illegal?'"
_ "Dick Cheney is capitalizing on this for Valentine's Day. It's the new Dick Cheney cologne. It's called Duck!"
___
"The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," Comedy Central:
_ "Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot a man during a quail hunt ... making 78-year-old Harry Whittington the first person shot by a sitting veep since Alexander Hamilton. Hamilton, of course, (was) shot in a duel with Aaron Burr over issues of honor, integrity and political maneuvering. Whittington? Mistaken for a bird."
_ "Now, this story certainly has its humorous aspects. ... But it also raises a serious issue, one which I feel very strongly about. ... moms, dads, if you're watching right now, I can't emphasize this enough: Do not let your kids go on hunting trips with the vice president. I don't care what kind of lucrative contracts they're trying to land, or energy regulations they're trying to get lifted it's just not worth it."
___
"Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson," CBS:
_ "He is a lawyer and he got shot in the face. But he's a lawyer, he can use his other face. He'll be all right."
_ "You can understand why this lawyer fellow let his guard down, because if you're out hunting with a politician, you think, 'If I'm going to get it, it's going to be in the back.' "
_ "The big scandal apparently is that they didn't release the news for 18 hours. I don't think that's a scandal at all. I'm quite pleased about that. Finally there's a secret the vice president's office can keep."
"Apparently the reason they didn't release the information right away is they said we had to get the facts right. That's never stopped them in the past."

[ShezaGirlie]

Tee hee hee...

[Ben Smith]

Doesn't Dick get two points for actually shooting a lawyer ??????

[RCB]

Doesn't Dick get two points for actually shooting a lawyer ??????

Only two points?:confused: He deserves 10!:D
Sorry Phyllis ;) :)

[hensylee]

"Hamilton, of course, (was) shot in a duel with Aaron Burr"

My children are r elated to Burr - sigh. Such a legacy.

I fell out of my chair when CNN sent an instant 'alert' of incoming news. Then nothing else was incoming except that the Veep shot somebody! Like Janie, I chuckled - a lot. But now it gets serious. Poor old fellow was just strollin along and BAM. When we reach 70, we really ought not to play with guns and rifles - and maybe matches.

They keep steppin in it, don't they?

[hpuehler]

The press sure needs to back off on this one. Next thing you know they'll want to hold a press conference when he takes a dump! Who cares! Sorry that the man got hit,but why should it be national news? I say he was off the clock and it did not compromise national security. Do people in the media need a job this bad, that this becomes breaking news?

I agree though 10 points!

Heather

[Ross]

Time for Dick to enroll in a hunter safety course I do believe. Shot an attorney no less. Can't wait to see what this leads up to.

[RCB]

Time for Dick to enroll in a hunter safety course I do believe. Shot an attorney no less. Can't wait to see what this leads up to.

Ross,
I'm not sure how hunters do it in your part of the state, but here in NW Ohio, anyone who comes up to reform the stalking line has the duty to let the other hunters know he is rejoining them. This is especially true if that person is coming up on the flank as was the case in this accident.
What is amazing to me iis how little the media seems to know about guns
and hunting. The average kid around here know more about these things, than most of the talking heads on TV. It is a different world out here and few in the media understand "fly-over land", but I guess I would be lost on a
New York subway!:D

[Karlynn]

anyone who comes up to reform the stalking line has the duty to let the other hunters know he is rejoining them. This is especially true if that person is coming up on the flank as was the case in this accident.


My uncle is an avid quail hunter and this was his comment as well. You flush out a covey of quail and start shooting. Guns are not aimed very high, so it's important that you let people know where you are. You are also quite often hunting in brush and scrub filled areas, not open fields so that the approach of someone isn't always evident. Thus the need to let your group know where you are if you've separated from them. He also said "Better the lawyer got shot than the hunting dogs....those things are expensive!" Thank goodness they weren't deer hunting.

I love how the gun lobbyists are making this an issue. This was a hunting party not a street gang. Don't get me wrong, I think we need better gun control...but taking this incident and making it sound like we shouldn't even allow hunting??????

[Ross]

I must be sick, I find this whole thing quite humorous.

[Christina L]

deal the Democrats and the liberals are making of this. It was a hunting accident - they happen all the time. I don't like hunting, but it is what it is.

My husband's coworker is a comedian also - Wayne is going to tour the White House on a business trip in late March. His coworker told him to remember to wear orange just in case Cheney is around that day. :D

Christina L

[Karlynn]

I must be sick, I find this whole thing quite humorous.

I find it humorous too. So many lawyer jokes going around.

I heard a parody of Cheney's call to Bush to tell him of the incident - it was hysterical.

[Marguerite53]

He's the vice president of the United States. He accidentally shot an old man and injured him. Don't you think he should let us know personally how sorry he is? Does he have to get his story SO straight that it hardly resembles the truth just to apologize and explain himself? Does the fact that he didn't have the proper liscense to be doing what he was doing prevent him from being honest with us? Even privelege comes with costs. Why won't he stand up to us?

I'm having trouble with the whole thing, but not so much the accident......more the abominable way the administration is handling yet another bogus incident.

Thanks for bundling those late night remarks for us! Makes it so easy to pass them along. :D

Marguerite

[Georgia]

This is the equivalent of Gerry Ford falling down the steps of Air Force I (or repeatedly hitting people on the golf course); or of G. Bush I throwing up on the Japanese prime minister. It just makes the person who's done the tripping, puking or shooting a bit of a buffoon. And just like George and Gerry, Dick needs to laugh at himself and everyone will get over it.

It was an accident; and it's a slow news time. I don't think most people think this has anything to do with gun control, and except for the PETA people, this will fade away as soon as all the good jokes are taken (and they are funny jokes).

[Christina L]

Cheney owes the country an apology for a personal matter. I'm sure he has apologized over and over to this man he accidentally shot and by the way, from what I gather from the accident, it was this old man's fault - he started to walk right in the line of fire.

Regarding the hunting license, supposedly that law just went into effect in Texas five months ago and a lot of people didn't know about it.

I don't know - it was an accident - a personal matter - I think it needs to be made fun of and nothing more, and then to let it go.

Christina L

[Wise]

It is a shame how every thing is being politicized these days. Of course the VP is sorry this happened, although it wasn't his fault. He certainly doesn't owe me an apology.

Finding humor in it is healthy and probably the best way to respond to it.

Wise

[PamO]

I agree - slow news day! The morning people on Fox were trying to describe how he got shot and it was actually very funny. Talking about how pellets fly through the air and how many will sit on a dime. Slow news day - filling time.

The VP doesn't owe the country an apology for this accident, just as Bush, Sr. didn't owe the country an apology for throwing up on the Japanese guy or Ford being the biggest klutz in the world. The only thing Dick did wrong was not buy the license. The lawyer was in the wrong, per established hunting rules (and I'm sure they teach lawyers in law school not to walk in front of guns too:D ).


Now, if Dickie did it on the White House lawn, that'd be a different story!

[Karlynn]

I think the majority of the country is taking this for what it is = an accident where the appropriate parties have already been apologized too, no one else deserves or requires one. I think the White House press is just having a collective hissy-fit because they weren't informed immediately.

And they did used to hunt on the grounds of the White House "way back when"!:)

[RCB]

I must be sick, I find this whole thing quite humorous.

You are sick, you know you are, everyone knows it and that is exactly what it takes to lead this motley gang of crazies here and we love you for it!:D

Would anyone sane do your job?:eek:

[tlhudson]

I agree it was a accident and the press corps has thier collective noses out of joint.

Ross, yes it is hallarious!:eek:

Maybe Chaney ought to take the press hunting so they too understand....."BE VEWEY AFWAID" (Elmer Fudd)....

I hear there are spots opening for his next trip...Maybe Hillary would go!:D

[Mary]

You are sick, you know you are, everyone knows it and that is exactly what it takes to lead this motley gang of crazies here and we love you for it!:D

Would anyone sane do your job?:eek:

I agree completely with RCB.
These are my thoughts, and I'm sticking to them!:p :p :p

[PJmomrunner]

In what kind of nation would the press ignore the fact that one of its heads of state shot a man??? If the Vice President's shooting a man is not news, what is??? I wouldn't suggest for a second that it was anything but an accident, but I am comforted by the idea that our free press will investigate and, in the end--hopefully--assure me and the rest of the watching world that it was, in fact, an accident.

As a non-hunter I do have some questions I'd like to see answered: Did he bring a friend hunting who had no knowledge of hunting protocol? Why was this man not educated in the ways of rejoining the stalking line? Were the guy's reflexes too slow to react in a common situation? Should someone have recognized this (if not Cheney, then how about his secret servicemen)? Maybe all of the aforementioned was covered completely and everyone did what they should have (excepting the guy who got shot)--I still want to know. And why did he not have his $7 quail ticket? He didn't KNOW he needed it? Come on..."but officer I didn't know the speed limit"...isn't good enough when Joe Citizen speeds in an automobile and it shouldn't be good enough for the VP of the USA with an entire staff at his disposal, no less. Shame on him if that's the best he's got.

I would be very disappointed if our press did not fully investigate AND I would be very surprised if they found much of note. To suggest that shooting a man--however accidental and however much he might share blame for the circumstances--is something to merely chuckle at and let go of or, worse yet, accept as some sort of expected collateral damage, demonstrates just how desensitized people can get.

[Christina L]

who is a "democrat" and who is a "republican" on this thread. :)

It is not really a funny situation - this hunting accident involving Cheney, but the comedians are taking it and running with it. I think the incident is being politicized (what else is new in this country) and I just think the incident needs to be put to rest. I'm tired of hearing about it and tired of hearing the democrats use it for their own political gain (it ain't gonna work, but they're trying).

Christina L

[Mary]

I don't think this incident is comparable to Ford's bumbling or the first president Bush's vomiting. In those cases, no one else was impacted by their actions.

If I had accidentally shot a person, I wouldn't consider it, "no big deal." If the person I shot had a mild heart attack as a result, I would be striken with guilt.
I can't imagine that I would play the "blame game" and try to determine if I were at fault, or if the person I shot were at fault. Unfortunately, the consequences aren't changed by whose fault it is.

[RCB]

who is a "democrat" and who is a "republican" on this thread. :)
Cristina L

Asked and answered!:D

[Granbonny]

Brit Hume (sp) interviewed the V.P. earlier today.It will be shown at 6 P.M on Fox...........First interview about what happened that day..Bonnie

[RCB]

Brit Hume (sp) interviewed the V.P. earlier today.It will be shown at 6 P.M on Fox...........First interview about what happened that day..Bonnie

He takes Bill Clinton's advice and bites his lower lip, brings a tear to his eyes, declaring "I feel this man's pain!" Then takes Jimmy Swaggart's advice and
falls to his knees, weeping and says "I have SINNED!" Maybe, that will satisfy the press........Hmmmm, No, not gonna happen!:rolleyes: ;) :D

[geebee]

Good grief. Here we have 2 friends who go hunting and there is a tragic accident. Guess what - it happens all the time. The only reason the press is making such a stink about this is they grab on to anything these days that cause "black marks" on the current administration. Every time I turn on the news I hear people talking about impeachment for somebody sneezing wrong.

I am sure Cheney feels badly for what has happened. Why should he have to apologize to ANYONE other than his friend and perhaps his friend's family.

[twinmaker]

After listening to this saga all day yesterday, into the evening and reading about it in the papers, I find it totally ridiculous that the press doesn't have anything better to report on. I mean, some of the accounts are already filling us in on what kind of homicide charges will be brought against the VP if this guy dies. I mean...give me a break! It was an accident, and accidents do happen when someone is hunting. Like most dangerous sports, you have to be willing to take some risks. LINDA

[Ross]

Like I said, I may be sick, but I find the whole thing humorous.

[RCB]

Like I said, I may be sick, but I find the whole thing humorous.

Can't swim?:eek: :D :D

[ShezaGirlie]

Hey there RCB.. I love you too honeybun and not to worry, I'm too dang old to change...:D And you're invited down here to South Texas anyday.. Shoot, I'll even drive ya around the pasture. Oops, maybe that was a poor choice of words...:eek:

I just couldn't resist again...you guys are the funniest!

[Granbonny]

I'm just glad that V.P was not shooting a Daisy Red Ryder.Thousand of past generations had them in their Xmas gifts. Wonder how many eyes have been shot out.:eek: B.B's bouncing back...:eek: I made the mistake of buying one for for Grandson when he was age 10...We had paper targets for him to shoot at..but, no..he wanted to shoot at other things. and those little suckers (B.B's)can really bounce back.:eek: ... Thank goodness, it was a passing thing..Got bored, when I told him..NO way you can shoot my birds....They are now collectables..from the 1930's...Bonnie

[Christian]

I'm just glad that V.P was not shooting a Daisy Red Ryder.Thousand of past generations had them in their Xmas gifts. Wonder how many eyes have been shot out.:eek: B.B's bouncing back...:eek: I made the mistake of buying one for for Grandson when he was age 10...We had paper targets for him to shoot at..but, no..he wanted to shoot at other things. and those little suckers (B.B's)can really bounce back.:eek: ... Thank goodness, it was a passing thing..Got bored, when I told him..NO way you can shoot my birds....They are now collectables..from the 1930's...Bonnie

I couldn't care less about Cheney and his shotgun and the swarm of political allegations flying about, but I have to respond to this. Summer before 8th grade, I was sent to Summer Camp. One of our activities was a bb-gun shooting range, and we all were given Daisy bb-guns and a bag of bb's. My first shot -- my VERY first shot -- ricoched (is that the proper past tense of richchet?) off a tree trunk and slammed me in the corner of my eye.

I was knocked flat and in agony for about 2 minutes (nobody wore goggles back then). But the paid eventually subsided and I was fine. Needless to say, every time I see the Christmas Story on TV I want to scream "YOUR MOTHER IS RIGHT!! EVERYONE IS RIGHT!!"

[gadgetman]

Down hyar we'd tell thet thar lawyer t'jest git up, brush it off an' git on wif it. Don't fo'git t'DUCK----o' is thet QUAIL???? Then we'd probably complain about him makin' us miss th' bird.:eek: :eek: :p :p :D :D

Honestly, when I was young (and maybe a little stupid---who me????:rolleyes: ) if the Dove shooting was slow that day we would pass the time shooting birdshot at each other. You were usually very far away (not like close up quail hunting) and it was just a spray. But it sure got your attention. And that was with 12 guage shotguns, not those whimpy 28 guage.:eek: :eek: :D

May God Bless,

Danny

[RCB]

Honestly, when I was young (and maybe a little stupid--

Danny

It must be a guy thing:rolleyes: :D

Girls just seem to be born with adult minds.:confused:

[hensylee]

I have heard no politicians give any opinions - only the press asking questions. They always stir the pot; it's their job. There aren't any secrets in government, nor should there be. Somebody always finds out. Private lives are never private, are they? Probably a shame but there it is.

I haven't heard anyone say anything much about the shootee except he got shot, had a heart attack, and is, incidentally, a lawyer, and will likely get well.

As a matter of interest how does one shoot quail? Do they shoot them while they are on the ground or flying?

[gadgetman]

Ann,

Quail hunting is usually done with dawgs, pointers to be exact. They call them pointers because that is what they do "Point". No, they don't say "hey, stupid, there are some birds over here":p , but they smell a covey (more than one quail) of birds and will go into a stance with one front paw raised and the tail straight out. They (if they are good) will stay that way until the birds flush. You don't shoot them on the ground (it is against the law in Georgia). You usually don't even see them until they fly. They get up with a loud noise that will startle you even when you are expecting it. The covey of birds will fly in all directions away from the hunter and the dawgs, usually very low. That is why it is very important for EVERYONE to know where EVERYONE ELSE is at all times.:eek: :eek: You NEVER get in front of the other hunters.:eek: The birds flush (that means get up and fly away for you HUNTING CHALLENGED:p ) and you only have a split second to get your shotgun up, aim and shot.

That was probably MORE than you wanted to know about quail hunting but YOU DID ASK!!!!!:D :D :D

I'm with Ross, YAWN!!!!!!!:D :rolleyes:

May God Bless,

Danny

[hensylee]

thanks, Danny. I really did want to know. As nearly everyone is trying to 'see' the scene, this helps to know how something could happen. Poor little quail. I know it's been a sport for forever; I just can't get a handle on it. Like it's said below - it's a guy thing.

We have some quail that live down the lane (our wee road) and they fly when the car approaches. They just run around and I guess they live and nest on the ground as that's where we always see them. Wonder if quail are the whippoorwhills we hear in the evenings and dawn hours. called turtledoves?

[tlhudson]

We have Quail here in Indiana, He was our Vice President once.:)

[Ross]

http://gorillamask.net/dscheney.shtml

[PJmomrunner]

......................LMAO!......................

[hensylee]

We have Quail here in Indiana, He was our Vice President once.:)

:p :p :D :D I have been waiting and waiting for this one. Great, T........

[geebee]

With Terry as my inspiration:

"so, what's with the two Bush Administrations and quails?
The current Administration has a VP who took a shot at a good quail.
The first Bush Administration took a shot that a Quayle would be a good VP."

[Christina L]

That video clip was hysterical and not far off from what is going on with the liberal media right now.

Christina L

[sue943]

That is hilarious. Thank you for posting it.

[hensylee]

This was in our weekly newspaper.

News from the Capitol: (Tallahassee)

(AP) Even Gov. Jeb Bush is taking a jab at Vice President Dick Cheney's accidental shooting of a hunting companion.

Bush, younger brother of President Bush, spoke to about 1000 people Monday at the Florida State Fair Gov's Day luncheon. All guests, including the governor, were given stickers from the Florida Farm Bureau that read, "No Farmers, No Food".

Bush placed the bright orange sticker, the same color as a hunting jacket, on his chest.

"I'm a little concerned that Dick Cheney is going to walk in", he said.

[Peggy in Alaska]

Saw this in the paper this morning from Jay Leno's late show ---

"I had a bad dream. I dreamed I was at a Washington party and had to choose between a hunting trip with Dick Cheney or having Ted Kennedy drive me home!"

Yuck Yuck Yuck!

[William]

It was a bad accident, but what's getting me most is the lag time. Why was is not reported at once, ASAP? In fact, it was only released AFTER the owner of the ranch called a local newspaper with the story, near a day later. Will